Heartbreak

Our court date was unsuccessful. I'm not going to say we didn't pass, because it had nothing to do with us and everything to do with a tiny bit more documentation the judge asked for before he would declare the case finalized.

And so, we wait. Our next court date is February 18th and if we pass then, we'll be able to go get him in March. We have received new tentative travel dates, but I have decided not to share them, just in case something goes wrong. It's been hard enough telling people we're not leaving when we thought we were.

Anna Graham said she thinks we will pass this next time and she wouldn't say that if she didn't mean it, so I will keep praying and try to be patient with the timing. It has been so long already, another month or so will not hurt us. Well, it will hurt, but it's what was intended, so we just need to take a step back, take a breath, and take our time getting ready so we can make sure we've got it all done.

On the bright side, I will get our taxes organized and my annual report done at work this month, so that will not be hanging over my head while we are gone.

The bummer of the whole thing is having to rearrange all our flights. Paying those change fees really blows. Oh well, we'll manage somehow.

So that's the news, kids. Love you all.

Waiting for Court

Courts open in Ethiopia in three hours. They will be closed by the time I go to work in the morning.

Gah...how do you sleep with this going on? The call tomorrow will let me know exactly what's going on. Either I'll put up pictures of my beautiful boy for everyone to see, or I'll slink back all depressed and have to gird myself for more of a wait.

Blech.

Stressful Days

Okay, I bit off more than I could chew. Thankfully, I've realized it, my husband's realized it, and we're going to do something about it, but more on that in a minute.

We're waiting for court on Monday, where Ethiopia will decide if we can travel and get our son when we were planning to. If all goes well, we leave in just under two weeks to bring him home. Altogether, this process has taken a year and eight months and now I feel that I'm nearing the end of my pregnancy, which would make me a rhinocerous or a sperm whale, I suppose, since they're pregnant for about that long. Haven't graduated to elephant yet (2 years) and lets hope I don't. Failing Monday would be awful. Then we'd have to wait another few months possibly before we could go.

Dagny is in the whiny stage and thinks that crying and not listening will get her what she wants. Terrible twos? No, we didn't have those. We're having terrifying threes. She lost her TV priveleges, her Wii priveleges, and all her barbies last weekend for not listening and she's in the process of earning them back. All of those things have now become rewards. If she brushes her teeth and changes her clothes without a fuss, she gets to watch one episode of the Upside Down Show, which she loves.

On the other hand, she's getting funnier and far more interesting. The other day while I was in the shower, she came in, pulled the curtain back, and proceeded to sing me "I can Show You The World" from Aladdin. She actually knows most of the words, too! It was very sweet.

Now, onto the major problem. I can't handle a dog right now. All I do is make sure she's not peeing on the carpet when she's out of her crate and I am not enjoying any relaxing time at home, which at the moment, the whole family really needs. I have no more alone time (I know, that won't last long anyway) which I used to get up early to accomplish, and I can't quite manage to enjoy a workout since I'm always craning my head around to see where the dog is or trying not to step on her.

So we're finding her a new home. I know, we've only had her for a few months, but that has shown me that I really don't want a puppy, especially not when we're trying to get ready to bring another child into our home. It was a mistake, but one that we can rectify. The kennel a few towns down will take her until we find a home for her and she's stayed there before for her training class, so she knows the man in charge and likes him. He also thinks he might have a buyer for her, since someone is looking for a puppy similar to her right now. And I called the breeder, who also thinks she can help, so with luck Belle will have a new home before we leave for Africa.

*sigh* It's been a long couple weeks and all I can do is wait and prepare for leaving...but it's hard to pack when you're not absolutely sure you're going anywhere...

What God Throws At You...

So, I'm all worried that we won't pass court this morning and God threw a few signs at me to let me know that, even if we didn't, everything was going to fine.

First Sign: I turn the calendar over to mark the tentative dates and...it's a picture of a large herd of elephants in Africa. Dagny just mentioned this morning that I would see elephants when we went to get her brother. God's words from the mouths of babes.

Second Sign: I had my toes done today in Sioux Falls with my friend Maria, and as we're sitting there, two women come in and sit down near us and start chatting and the language sounds faintly familiar. So I lean over and ask "Excuse me, what language are you speaking?" And the woman smiles at me and says...

"Amharic. Ethiopian." And we start talking. They are going to Ethiopia tomorrow to visit family and will be in Addis for two months. They taught me how to say our son's name and looked at his picture and said he was going to be beautiful and very tall. And they told me what his name means together (first and middle) and it is so fitting. I can't wait to share it. And they taught me how to say "I love you." And one of them gave me her phone number and told me to call her while we are in Addis.

I can't help but think that God would not have given me these things today if he didn't want me to rest assured that he is working in his way to bring my family together.

Travel Dates!

So...if we pass court on the 26th of January, we are slotted to travel February 7th. That's a month from YESTERDAY!! I might meet my son in a month!!

I'm not sure what to think, though. The other families that have struggled with me through the wait (remember the four muskateers) - well, all three of those families are traveling February 21st - 28th, so we won't be together. This actually makes me really sad and really ecstatic at the same time. I so desperately wanted to meet them and travel with them and share this experience with them, but now I have to do it before they do, without them.

However, I get to meet my son a lot sooner, which makes me really excited and really terrified, all at the same time. Not sure what to think. I'll post more later, after I think on it more.

And Down it Comes...

I took the tree down today. That always makes me sad. I love how my house looks at Christmas and I love the tree, all the decorations, my nativity set, all of that. I had to think really hard about leaving it up until our boy comes home, but since that will probably be another two months, the neighbors might think I was insane.

We had our home study update done yesterday! The state of MN requires an in-home visit for the update, so our social worker had to drive all the way from Minneapolis (about four hours) in not the best of weather, but everything went fine. We talked about our new jobs, our new dog, and she asked about our reactions to some of the difficulties that other families are going through.

I know this will be hard. Since I'm not a first-time parent, I know a bit about what to expect on the physical end, and since I'm adopted myself, I can imagine some of the things that will go on in his head. Of course, there will be things that he might remember that I have no experience with...I have never lacked for food, or shelter, or love. Never. And he has, which breaks my heart. I know from the day he came to the orphanage, he has not lacked for food, shelter, or love for that matter, but there was a time.

Church mentioned adoption today, with a reading from Ephesians. God called us to do this, to adopt a little boy into our family, just as he has adopted every one of us into his. And it feels good to follow that call, even though we know there are hardships ahead.