Going Crazy

I'm not actually sure how much longer I can stand this. We're somewhere in the top ten (or very close) as I've written before which means that, with luck, we might get a referral later this month or the beginning of October.

I don't know how other families have stood this! Every time the phone rings, I jump, and I'm crying every day. I stalk the adoption list to see if there were any referrals and I feel dejected when a day goes by without one. I never worried about it before, now its become an obsession. i'm having a very hard time thinking about anything else.

Dagny is talking more and more about how her brother can share this, her brother can have that, she wants to cuddle him and kiss him, and she asks all the time when I'm going to Africa to get her brother. She's obsessing, too! The whole family is obsessing!

How much longer can I take it without going bonkers? I mean, I know its all in God's good timing, but can't the time speed up a little? I'm ready now! Right, there's my whining for the day.

Enough whining. I need to get in the shower and get myself to work. Tonight I have a few things to do, so maybe that will keep me from obsessing too much. Banana bread, tomato processing, picking more stuff from the garden, organizing the freezer...there's lots of things to do...

Come on, God, hurry it up! :)